I had experience with biofeedback as a child for controlling stress. 11 yr old kid in 1983 and I could control a computer with my mind. It was pretty cool for me. [make a sound go up and down, and controlling a basic video game block). More similar to neurofeedback is TENS. I had a TENS machine about 18 years ago I got from eBay. It pulses making your muscles go back and forth against each other. At a very low setting, it can help control migraines when put on the temple. But the thing that makes neurofeedback better, is it has a better level of control than the TENS machines do and works at a lower frequency. TENS is more randomized.

I had experience with [read full article]


when your husband is having an affair and you find out and you also happen to understand the importance of the hard work it takes to make and sustain a working relationship but since you still jointly own everything, you’re really just drawing on your own car (technically) so its really ok to do this, especially as it is an example of clear communication during a time in a relationship when clear communication can prove difficult.

when your husband is [read full article]


The local police commissioner identified three groups: The protesters The counter protesters The anti police. There were 27 arrested (anti police faction, not the counter protesters), and 40000 who weren’t. The free speech people (the protesters, or white power people or unitetherightpeople, whatever), had an opportunity to speak. They spoke. They were safely escorted away. It was a success. They learned from Charlottesville. Other towns will follow Boston’s pattern because it worked.

The local police commissioner [read full article]


I’m from NJ. There, rebel flag meant “rebel”. No big deal. Here in FL, people put gigantic rebel flags on flagpoles on their pickup trucks for a while although most seem to be putting up American flags instead. Anyway, it’s a thing. There’s a southern pride thing I learned that has little to do with what the news says. It’s more like, “hey, we’re distinctive”. But the statue stuff? Eh. I don’t care either way so long as people from out of state don’t come pouring in to DEFEND a statue if my community decided to REMOVE it. None of their business.

I’m from NJ. There, [read full article]


Depends on the situation as to what’s acceptable. I talk in general until race is brought up and if it’s relevant, THEN I’ll say “as a white” or “as a white male” or whatever, *if* that’s the social convention in that situation. Sometimes the races of who is talking or listening makes a difference. Sometimes it doesn’t. I’d prefer it never did but I was raised with that assumption, “If we don’t talk about [x] it goes away” and it turns out that while that works SOMETIMES, it doesn’t ALWAYS. In the case of black vs white, substitute words replaced saying “black”, which made the situation worse because it became an invisible problem for a while, couched under other names.

Depends on the situation [read full article]


I can give some hidden clues that might be invisible on the outside. Here’s a hint: If it wasn’t for the 80s Southern WASPy right usurping American pride and intermingling it with tent revival fundamentalist TV evangelism and claiming “America” for themselves, I’d gladly wear an American pin because I’m proud of when America does things right but I’m also disappointed when America does things wrong.

I can give some [read full article]