REMEMBER: To be a writer, all you have to do is write.
Being published is a business activity that has nothing to do with being writer. Getting recognized as an author is a social activity which has nothing to do with writing.
Writers write. If you want to organize it somehow into a book that sells and gets people to like your way of thinking, well then you have to coordinate a whole bunch of NOT WRITING things… things that actually take away from being a writer. That’s why so many people who make money writing have agents, to handle that stuff.
So to me? Just write. Don’t worry about the rest of it. I’m not a role model btw – I don’t even edit. I just produce, produce, produce wherever I go and I’m a writer, not a published author… although I *did* self publish two books on Amazon, which I did as QUICKLY as I could because I wanted to avoid all the stress over publishing THE PERFECT BOOK. I just wanted to understand the process of getting it up there – and it’s not hard. So, no heartbreak required