Kept looking around for Santa Claus. Hard not laughing. Waited ’til she left.

Been, done, too much. Mostly college, some beyond. Never could get over the ridiculousness of it, especially one girlfriend who had multiple rings on every finger and toe, piercings and necklaces. Kept looking around for Santa Claus. Hard not laughing. Waited ’til she left.

 By the time that relationship was over, I knew more about her high school sweetheart than he knew about himself. Wasn’t a bad parting. One day I said, “Look, just go back to him. Distance doesn’t matter.” She was relieved as was I because she was needy, which was fine, but the jingling was just too much and i think she caught me smirking a few times.
Confirmed Bachelor without the gay implications. Some people call me a monk around here. I tried non Sheldon life but Sheldon life works better for now. Not worried though; I get offers from both genders, so should I ever feel the need, I don’t expect a problem.

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