KENNETH UDUT’S BASEBALL STORY:
7th Grade. Required Baseball. Gym. I have 2D vision so the only way I knew something was coming at me is to gauge the size. Maybe regular people are like that too, I dunno. Outfield. Avoided ball as much as possible. Crack. Ball gets bigger and bigger. I stand still, confused. Suddenly, I realize, IT’S COMING RIGHT FOR ME! I hold glove ready. It’s coming for my FACE! I duck instead of moving glove in front of face. BANG! Center of back. I go down, breathing like the wind got knocked out of me, because the wind got knocked out of me.
Sympathy? Zero. Laughter? Many.
Gym teacher allowed me to bench myself for the rest of the “LET’S DO BASEBALL FOR A CHANGE!” segment of gym class. He finally listened to me.
Thankfully, next segment was basketball. Nobody laughed then .. except when I forgot what team I was playing for… but such is why me and sports = fuggetaboutit.