It all depends on your reference point.

It all depends on your reference point.
When I was 24, I felt very old. Very tired. Worn out. Finished. Kaput.
Couldn’t figure out why. I knew rationally 24 years old isn’t old so why did I *feel* so old?
Then when sitting on a beach with friends, looking at a grain of sand and imagining all the little tunnels and fractures that I couldn’t see in it, it clicked on:
I was old because I was comparing myself to when I was 16.
A 24 year old makes for a very old 16 year old. That’s 16 years old for the 9th time.
So, maybe you have a reference age that you imagine yourself as being too old for.
I’m going through it again. I’m 49 and my reference age was 42 for a while. I liked 42. But 49 is old for being 42, although not as old as being 16 years old at 24 years old. (fractions).
So I go through the “ugh” moments in the mirror, gripe about weird 49 year old things that I didn’t gripe about at 42 and I’m approaching a point where I’ll see myself as a “young Eric Hochman” instead of an old 42. Not there yet though.
 oh! I was being very linear – and did not think of the related “why haven’t you reached [achievement] by [reference age]?”
Mine is linked to things like “how my body is functioning at this time”.
Like, I always had arthritis, even as a teenager. So I was used to weird arthritis things. But then something new. “Why do I feel the inside of my LEFT UPPER LEG BONE?!” must be cancer.
Then I remember, no, it’s stupid weather and a new arthritis thing. Always a new adventure.

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