I was very serious and straightforward. I said what I thought. I never raised my hand.
I had no problem speaking up to children or adults.
but I wasn’t fun. I played but I spent more time trying to figure out what was going on than joining.
I had a temper. it wasn’t always anger but “inconsolable”.
my mother took me to biofeedback training at 11.
I got hooked up to a computer and controlled a little character with my feelings.
I listen to tapes where I had to “breathe through my feet”, be a warm bottle in the beach with the waves crashing nearby etc.
I guess that’s a guided meditation or something I don’t know.
it helped. She did it because I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder.
she could’ve put me on Ritilin or something which I didn’t know until much later in life.
It’s not that she didn’t believe that drugs worked but she preferred noninvasive stuff.
and it worked for the most part. gained some self-control.
I still work on it to this day.
I haven’t changed. I am the same inwardly.
I have no real idea how people perceive me although I’ve allowed myself to be much more introverted lately which i used to fight more.