I wasn’t saying you had any connection beyond a similar story which had a different context and a different conclusion but a similar middle.
I was sharing Abe/Alice’s reality as best I understood it in case you would find it interesting.
If it is boring, then my apologizes for sharing. I assume everybody is unique already and am not categorizing people into groups. If I gave that impression, then I failed in communication this time.
My foster sister Ali ce (once thought foster brother A be), who was married with kids and in mid-60s before beginning transition, described being in the wrong body as going to a fancy party wearing your fancy clothes but being unable to take them off when you get home. Ever.
She’s probably in her early 80s now – lost track of her – but definitely a character.
As Abe, he owned an HVAC company that did pretty well in very conservative pennsylvania… so the transition process was apparently chaotic and full of problems and harassment from the local community.
A be’s transition to Alice was a very very long time ago.
But I don’t think non-binary would have been a valid option. The danger didn’t stem from traditional transgenderism but rather from being in/from SUCH a conservative community that the safest comprehendible answer was: “other” gender from a binary set.
Wife divorcing, children keeping the grandkids away, employees leaving, house getting burned down by bad neighbors — all of these were actually very NORMAL consequences from _any_ significant change – but they basically understood “girl in boy body” because it was still in the binary system even though they hated it.
Non-binary would not likely have been an option given the low education of the area, low opportunities for anything like this.