i strive to be friendly and friends but there are things I don’t tolerate of course.

Good distinction.  I strive for friendliness.  Could I be friends with a homophobe?  I could but it would be something we’d argue about because, like you, it’s something I don’t tolerate.

Could I be friends with a backbiting gossip?  I could, but that would be one of those things that goes outside of my tolerance zone, and I would continually defend whoever they were gossiping about, just because I don’t believe in backbiting gossip.

I try to limit my contact with friends whose value systems are very strongly different than mine.  I’d be friendly towards them,  and be friends only in those areas in which my value systems weren’t contradicted, but if they start getting “political” about their opinions, well, then I have to excuse myself from the situation or there just might be a bickering/verbal confrontation which I don’t really care for.  They’re exhausting :)

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