How does one go about becoming more confident?

How does one go about becoming more confident?


Depends on the situation. You prepare. Prepare until you don’t know how else to prepare further. You get bored of preparing. Or maybe you have no idea how to prepare further and get stressed.

That’s when you stop preparing.

GO/NO GO?

Decide. You can’t prepare any further. You’ve exhausted that option.

GO or NO GO.

You’re at the pinnacle.

Your GO or NO GO decision can be made with full confidence either way.

From that point forward, you will have full confidence.

After that, you’ll get more information. “You should have done [x]. You should have done [y].”

Doesn’t matter. You didn’t have that information before. You made the best decision you could with the information you had at the time.

Do you stick with it or change?

That starts a new cycle. Prepare until bored or stressed or other signal that says, “Preparation time is over”. Then GO/NO GO.

Whatever you do after GO/NO GO, you are doing with full confidence.

You don’t have to have confidence combined with ignorance. You can bring your whole everything into it.

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If you don’t have time for that?
Assess yourself.

CAN I PREPARE as I go along?

If so, jump in. You know yourself. You’re not faking it: You’re just doing on the job training with full confidence that you WILL reach that point where you are fully competent.

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Also: Arm yourself with lots of meaningful phrases. “Just do it!” “You got this!” “I’m [flattering adjective]!”

It works.

Zig Ziglar and that whole family of stuff is great for confidence building if you need it. Anthony Robbins, NLP, anything by Nightingdale/Conant (I think that’s them) – all good stuff if you need it.

Let them boost you up and fill your head with positive stuff. If you need it, it helps. I had my phase with it. It works.

Another addition:

Other people. You know that feeling of, “I’m not competent in [this area]?” That’s great! It means you have an opportunity to make connections by FINDING people who _are_ more competent in those areas where you are weak, forging alliances and allowing them to strengthen you.

You remain in control. You don’t know it all. You can’t know it all. But you can find someone who knows what you don’t, and THEN you’ll know what they know.

 

-Kenneth Udut, Aug 22, 2016.

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