Eh, you get used to it and figure out socially appropriate responses.
Sometimes it’s someone mentally undressing you. Sometimes it’s just a ‘glint’ in the eye where they want to absorb every part of you into their brain, like they’re mapping out your insides as well as your outsides and storing them forever.
Sometimes it’s more basic than that, Predator/Prey like.
I tell myself it’s “I’m a ‘somebody’ to you? Ok. Time for me to play a role.” and I choose a socially appropriate role for the time we’re communicating. [whoever it is, whatever the age or gender or species]
I know the different looks, the body language, etc but I also know where I stand and how I should respond in a way that’s socially ok but more importantly, I’m ok with.
I don’t want to lead anybody on, so use the roles to act as a friendly wall. It’s still me but through the projector of “mentor / teacher / friendly neighbor (hidie-ho diddley-do neighbor) / librarian / nerd / store clerk / ‘typical-clueless-man-who-isn’t-getting-the-hint’ – whatever I think will help put up a slight wall to prevent encouraging them to go any further but still remain cordial long enough for me to make my escape from the situation and back to what I was doing.
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What sucks is getting no time to think. The time between I “see” the message and I have to respond is like 1 second? Maybe 2 seconds?
So, it’s just enough time to think “Shit, you want ME? I don’t think so.” :: snaps into role ::.
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I don’t know if it’s woes of youth. I still get it and I’m not young. I think maybe it’s because I’m not looking for anybody that makes me stand out or something as “available” to those who think in that way? I dunno. I never understood ’cause I doubt it’s looks.
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Maybe that’s it, although I get it from people who couldn’t see my hands or who probably aren’t looking in terms of marriage. It’s more like “crush” I guess.
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