Before a choice is made, It can be changed.

I feel for his brother and his family that were left behind. He was going to be 20 years old in a few weeks.

Existential angst “What’s the point of it all?” “Who am I really?” “What if all I am is only I was before, and there’s nothing new to look forward to? What if I am only the roles I play and there are no useful parts for me to play anymore?” is part of the human condition.

Is that why? Do we know? Will we find out? Could have been many things.

Suicide is not always preventable. But temporary states of mental illness is common across every walk of life and one only has to be entirely hopeless for a short time and make a single, bad choice in order to NEVER be able to say, “Whoops! I feel better now! Wow I almost made a huge mistake!”.

Look for signs of trouble within yourself.

Look for signs of trouble within family and friends.


Sometimes we assume, “Oh, they’ll be fine. They’re just perfectionists who are never satisfied.” “Oh, they’re just whining”. And maybe they are. But maybe they’re not.

Listen. Be understanding. Listen to yourself. Understand yourself. Other people exist to help you see yourself in ways that you can’t see yourself.

It’s true that nobody understands the real you. Mindreading seems to be impossible and few of us are really that good at self-expression.

But –

It’s ALSO true that you’re human. Someone doesn’t have to understand everything about you to understand ENOUGH of who you are. Find a sympathetic ear. Get help, professional if needed.

They exist for a reason and if you or someone you know seems to be in that state, remember:

As unique as you are, the parts of you that need help are not unique.
These emotions exist in all humans. Help exists.

Maybe nothing would have helped Sawyer Sweeten.
Maybe something would have helped Sawyer Sweeten.

He’s gone now. There’s no way we’ll ever know for sure.

But perhaps you can help somebody who is still here.

Perhaps it’s somebody you know.
Perhaps it’s somebody else: yourself.
You don’t have to walk this road alone.
That’s why other people exist.

Not everybody can help. But somebody can.

They won’t see this, but my condolences to the family and friends of Sawyer Sweeten and my best hopes to those who AREN’T where he is but ARE where he was before he made his choice.

Before a choice is made,
It can be changed.

Kenneth Udut – April 24, 2015

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