I like some friends that “fit my vibe” and also like some friends that make me go, “Woah, wait a minute, how can you think that!?” which forces *me* to question my own thinking on matters.
After all, they came to their conclusions from somewhere as I did from mine.
So I have to backtrack and try to reconcile. There’s always a way to reconcile or very nearly always. So if I find someone that consistently ‘gets my goat’, I want them as my friend and I want the challenge of understanding their point of view *and* accepting its validity from their standpoint. I feel broadened when I do that, as if a whole category of thinkers have their ways of thinking exposed and open to me and I can say, “Yes, I understand you”. without following with, “but you’re wrong”.
I can _also_ follow up with, “but you’re wrong”, but I will do so from an understanding position.
Just as powerfully, this whole process forces me to consider the places where I’m wrong, as I go through the process of reconciling their ideas with my own. It tempers the knee-jerk in me and forces me to listen more closely.